You’re studying: It’s only our first full week back, but, of course, most of us already have some studying to do. Next time you hit the books, try listening to the “The House We Grew Up In” by Hammock. (Or really any song by Hammock. This one just happens to be my favorite.) Most of their songs don’t have lyrics, making them the perfect ambient music for studying.
You’re working out: My go-to workout song will always be “The Pretender” by Foo Fighters. If you can somehow push through that slow intro (trust me, it’s easier said than done), this song will give you the boost you need to complete that last rep or finish those last few seconds on the treadmill.
Runners up: “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana and “No Sleep Till Brooklyn” by The Beastie Boys.
You’re in love: Because, you know, there aren’t enough love songs out there, and you obviously need me to enlighten you. (That was sarcasm… Anyone? No? Ok.) I don’t want to pick just one. And this is my column, and I can do whatever I want, so here are three: “January Wedding” by The Avett Brothers, “You and Me” by Lifehouse and “Tiny Dancer” by Elton John.
You just got dumped, and you need to ugly-cry: Hands down, “River” by Joni Mitchell. Remember when Jess from “New Girl” broke up with that one guy and annoyed all of her roommates by listening to the same song over and over again? Well, this was that song, and for good reason. Just push play, grab a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, and let it all out.
Runner up: “I Can’t Make You Love Me” by Bonnie Raitt.
You’re finally over your ex: “Changing of the Seasons” by Two Door Cinema Club. “When you say you won’t forget me/ Well I can tell you that’s untrue/ ‘cause every day since you left me/ I thought less and less of you.” Need I say more?
You’re drunk: Any song by Pearl Jam. Don’t worry if you slur your words… You’ll sound even more like Eddie Vedder.
It’s raining outside: “Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Right” by Bob Dylan. Somehow the sound of rain in the background manages to make my favorite Bob Dylan song even better. Although, I’m pretty sure rain does that to almost every song.
Runner Up: “The Ghost of Tom Joad” by Bruce Springsteen.
You’re driving: “Snow” by Red Hot Chili Peppers. In reality, I believe this is the perfect song for every possible occasion, but I didn’t want to get too redundant, so I’ll just put it here.
Runner Up: “Smooth” by Santana. Bonus points if your windows are rolled down. Speaking of which…
You’re driving fast with the windows down: “All Right Now” by Free. Or pretty much any classic rock song. This is what they were made for.
You’re stressed: “Amber” by 311. It’s impossible to be stressed while listening to this song. It’s just too happy and relaxing.
Runners Up: “Crystalised” by The xx and “Zebra” by Beach House.
You’re a nostalgic senior: “Graduation (Friends Forever)” by Vitamin C. Cue montage of dreamy flashback images.
You’re looking for new(ish) music: “Epilogue” by Crosses, “It’s About Time” by Young The Giant, “The Walker” by Fitz and the Tantrums, “Giants” by Bear Hands… I could go on.
You’re dancing around in your underwear: Pretty much anything by Beyonce will suffice. Have your pick and start shakin’.
Runners Up: “Love Me Again” by John Newman and “Tokyo (Vampires & Wolves)” by The Wombats.
