About 1,300 international students currently study at The University of Alabama. My freshman year, I learned that the majority of these students will never step foot in an American home, a fact that changed the course of my college career. International students from 78 countries have come all the way to Tuscaloosa, Alabama, to learn about American culture, values and language, and far too often we rob them of that opportunity by not inviting them into our lives. To some extent, I feel I understand their struggle. 

When I studied in Hong Kong, I was eager to soak in everything that I could, but the language and cultural barrier was rather intimidating. One day I met a local student named Amber on the bus, and she invited me to hang out the following week. She followed up with me on Facebook, and we went rock climbing and then ate at McDonald’s. I got to learn a little bit about her life, her culture and her family. I’m not sure she realizes the impact that night had on me, but it was one of the highlights of my summer.

Over the past couple of years, fostering intercultural relationships has kind of become my “thing,” and this shift in priorities has changed my life for the better. If you do not have an international friend, let me tell you, you are missing out. Some of the friends I’ve treasured most have come from China, Japan, Saudi Arabia, France and Italy, to name only a few. I will make the distinction at this point that international students are not projects; they are real people, with real senses of humor and personalities and interests. 

Thus, though I am not dismissing cultural or language differences, having an international friend is really not that different from having an American friend. My international friends and I have spent Christmas, spring break and football games together; we go shopping, hang out at Starbucks and meet up for lunch often. In short, we do all of the same things that I do with my American friends. The difference in my opinion is that we have a lot more to teach each other. I get to learn about what college students in Osaka, Japan do for fun or what life is like for women in Saudi Arabia. At the same time, I get to share about my experiences as a 20-year-old Christian living in Alabama. Efforts to increase mutual understanding and respect are never wasted, but given the current political and social climate in the U.S., they have become all the more important.

Another reason to befriend international students is that it is quite simply the decent thing to do. Life in another country is hard and exhausting. One thing it should not be is lonely. When an international student is surrounded by 36,000 Americans, there is just no excuse for him or her to not know any domestic students – and yet 40 percent of international students never make a single American friend. 

For a region known for our “southern hospitality,” it is clear that our apathy toward the international community shows we are not putting our best foot forward in terms of making others feel welcome. The burden is on us as local students who understand the culture, language and norms to make the first move, not the international students who are likely overwhelmed and uncomfortable. If this in and of itself is not convincing enough of a reason to befriend an international, bear in mind that international students are often the “best of the best” in their home countries and become the movers and shakers in their countries of origin once they return. You may well be the only American they ever interacted with during their time abroad, and therefore you may shape their entire perception of the U.S. I believe America is a great country full of kind people. I hope that returned international students, as informal U.S. ambassadors, share my sentiments, but I fear this is typically not the case. I think that we have a duty to do better.

So, you should make a deliberate effort this semester to befriend international students. If you do not know where to start, I have some tips. Hang out outside BB Comer in between classes and strike up a conversation. If you want a little more structure, you can enjoy free food and fellowship at International Coffee Hour (every Friday from 11:30 a.m. – 1 p.m. in Room 121 BB Comer Hall). Finally, just open your eyes. I can virtually guarantee that you currently have a class with an international student. Ask them if they want to get together and study, or if they need a ride home from class; many internationals live off-campus without cars! I realize that introducing yourself to a complete stranger may fall way out of your comfort zone, but remember that nobody has ever died of awkwardness. Saying hello just may be the best decision you ever make.

Lauren Deutsch is a junior majoring in operations management. Her column runs biweekly.