There’s been a lot of discussion lately on the topic of rape. Daniel Tosh and his joke to the woman at a comedy club, Rep. Todd Akin with his “legitimate rape” comment – it’s definitely a hot-button issue. I’ve been to parties where this is the main discussion, and the thing that gets me: Why is it even a discussion at all?
In mid-July Tosh was doing stand-up at the Laugh Factory in New York City. One of his bits involved wondering why society thought rape jokes weren’t funny. After this, a woman in the crowd stood up and said loudly enough for him to hear, “Actually, rape jokes are never funny!” Tosh then reportedly said, “Wouldn’t it be funny if that girl got raped by, like, five guys right now? Like right now?” The backlash on Tosh was severe, and he eventually issued an apology over Twitter.
As for Rep. Akin, on Aug. 19, he went on a St. Louis TV show and answered a question about whether or not abortion is justified in the case of rape. He said verbatim: “It seems to be, first of all, from what I understand from doctors, it’s really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down.”
I’m not a doctor, but I made a 96 in my human anatomy class in tenth grade, and I think that qualifies me to make the statement that what Akin said is absolute crap. I don’t know what doctors he paid off to say that, but shame on them, and shame on him for even saying it.
Rape is more than physically scarring – the trauma extends mentally and emotionally. In 2009, 1 in 6 women reported being raped or sexually assaulted, and those are just the reported incidents. Chances are, when Tosh made that comment about men dropping from the ceiling and raping that woman, there were several women in the audience who had experienced sexual assault. His words probably triggered memories of fear, hopelessness and unimaginable pain all because of a joke.
I know women reading this will understand what I’m talking about, but for the men, simply imagine living in fear at all times. Imagine not being able to take a walk in your neighborhood after dark because you’re not sure if the man two houses down is really as neighborly as he seems. Imagine cringing every time someone of the opposite sex sits beside you on the bus because you can’t help but think his actions are less than noble. Try to think what it must be like to be in constant fear of being assaulted.
It isn’t fun.
And it doesn’t seem like society is doing much to stop it. While at the beach with my friend’s family, I overheard the mother and her 18-year-old son discuss the Tosh incident. I honestly wasn’t surprised when the boy defended Tosh, saying it’s just a joke and people need not to take things so seriously, but it took all I had to keep my jaw from dropping to the floor when his mother said she agreed. I couldn’t believe that not only has our culture made it okay to joke about these things, but then apparently condones it. Being “offensive” and “edgy” is perceived as “cool” by much of the populace.
I have a friend who was given pepper spray for her 13th birthday “just in case.” And this is the society we live in. A society that tells women, “Hey, the shorter the skirt, the more you’re asking for it.” A society that convinces men that they’ve earned it. It doesn’t matter that the woman says “no,” she secretly wants you. This is a society where, on average, men make $819 a week to women’s $657. This is a male-dominated society, and no matter how much women may try to change it, we need your help.
Stop making rape jokes when you’re playing Xbox. Stop feeling entitled to sex. Stop belittling our opinions and experiences, and help us. Stand up to your friends when they do these things, see where the nearest Slutwalk is happening and get involved – just do something. Don’t stand idly by, I beg you.
Beth Lindly is a copy editor for The Crimson White.
