As I sit at a stoplight at an intersection on McFarland, the green arrow appears on the traffic light. I wait for the car in front of me to turn, and before I can take my foot off the brake, the blare of horns behind me drowns out the podcast coming from my radio. I think to myself, “I can’t remember the last time I used the horn on my car, not counting the deer jumping across the road last week in my hometown.”
A common phenomenon for those of us who grew up below the Mason-Dixon line– the headbutting of southern hospitality with a northern attitude.
Our styles of driving are one of many ways differences in cultural and habitual norms present themselves when examining where someone is from. What some of us view as “common courtesies” are not that common for many UA students. The University of Alabama is an amalgamation of identities, emerging not only across the United States, but internationally. As of fall 2023, 58.3% of students were attending from out of state, and 3% internationally.
While there is a partial sense of adaptation when it comes to attending an SEC school, which may include changingone’s vocabulary, dressing for a different climate or changing one’s appearance, the way we interact with each other is something that has been embedded in us since childhood.
The way we talk, the way we dress, the way we drive — there are certain traits and mannerisms that are clear indicators that someone is from below the Bible Belt or above it. Perhaps the most significant is the way we interact with each other. While it is easy to poke fun and prod at those who have different lived experiences than us, there are significant benefits when we try to learn from our neighbors who might not live so close.
When it comes to manners, the North and South each have their own distinctive styles shaped by historical, cultural and social influences.
William Ferris, a University of North Carolina folklorist, tells StarNews that southern hospitality may be a way of hiding anger.
“Manners are often a way of distancing and maintaining space. If someone is polite, you better be careful and consider what that politeness veils.”
Studies also show that Southerners are more likely to react negatively (or even violently) to altercations, such as being run into, than their Northern counterparts. These behavioral patterns aren’t only a cultural norm, but a means of self-defense. By interacting in a mindful or genteel manner, one is promoting an amicable exchange and preventing potentially threatening situations from occurring.
The rules of “Southern Manners” are nowhere close to universal. While someone you encounter who interacts differently than you may seem impolite, it’s likely that they are from an area that doesn’t allot manners the same societal prevalence as in the South. The way Southerners greet each other in the grocery store and hold the door open behind one another at the gas station are interactions not all of us grew up knowing.
Even if you may not be used to hearing a horn in traffic, or you’re perhaps taken off guard hearing the word “y’all” in conversation, this crossing and combining of cultures is occurring. The sharing of different ideas and lifestyles contributes to what is considered the way of life on campus. Interacting with those from other places makes us more well-rounded and gives us a broader perspective outside of the regions we find familiarity in.
