I can remember being in elementary school and seeing all of the older people around me and on TV. I would watch shows centered around high school and college, and I couldn’t wait to be 16 with a car, because then I would be a “real” adult. I would graduate college, get a job, start a family and have everything figured out because that is what adults do. 

Fast forward to the age of 22, and it’s clear that very few of us actually know what we are doing.

College is a stepping stone into the adult world. Freedom comes in small doses, such as getting to live away from home and come and go as one pleases. But this comes with the security of still having the structure that school has always provided. Many of us have jobs and take pride in the fact that we make our own money, but know we can still call home if need be. Thousands of students live in apartments and pay rent, but some may not have the worry of buying furniture or balancing upkeep because some student apartments come furnished and maintenance is just a phone call away. 

Bars are frequented on a nightly basis because we are adults and we can do as we please, but we will still rush out once we remember that assignment that’s due at midnight. Internships can be awarded to give people a taste of the working world, but instead of being paid for our time, some of us get school credit toward our degrees – or “life experience,” AKA nothing at all. 

We are told to try all of our wild, out-of-the-box ideas now because if they flop, no one shames us since college is about being risky and experimental. As students, everyone feels like adults but we fail to acknowledge the invisible safety net that is always there to catch us. 

We all get the concept of building our resumes for jobs and presenting ourselves as though we have it all together. In reality, many students still do not know the basics behind things like doing taxes, building credit or house-hunting in a new city. As kids, everyone figures that these are things learned along the way. As adults, we realize that these things are not taught as frequently or as effectively as they should be, leaving people to learn by trial and error.

Sometimes it seems as though half the people from high school are married with kids and houses, and the other half are unemployed and going out every night while their parents foot the bill. Which side is doing it right? Where is the happy medium?

As May nears, many 2020 graduates are likely very anxious because of the mystery of what’s ahead. We are realizing that our safety nets are being taken away, and maybe we don’t know as much as we thought. Conversations with our parents about their own mistakes and missteps make it clear that it doesn’t necessarily get easier when we get older; we just learn more coping mechanisms and ways to figure it out along the way. 

As time goes on, we realize that we never really get all the answers and learn that there is no clear-cut way to do this grown-up thing.