Alabama vs. Colorado State
These two teams met in 2013, and big changes have happened since then. For one, Colorado State saw Jim McElwain leave for the Florida job and replaced him with Mike Bobo. Colorado also passed a law that should make Colorado State players be a little more, how do I say this, relaxed. Alabama has also been through a lot of changes since that 31-6 win. They’ve won a national championship and went through 1.3 offensive coordinators.
Even with all of this, It should be a similar game as the 2013 matchup. This game will see Alabama dressed out in its usual crimson and white uniforms, while Colorado State will probably just wear tie-dye Grateful Dead T-shirts, bandanas and flip flops. I expect Alabama to be ready, while Colorado State players are probably still recovering from Phish’s three-night Denver run from two weeks ago.
Louisville vs. Clemson
This game puts the country’s two fastest quarterbacks up against each other. Touchdown machine Lamar Jackson is picking up right where he left off from his Heisman campaign last season. Kelly Bryant looks to be a worthy successor to Deshaun Watson, and Clemson’s pass rush sacked Auburn about 78 times last week. Really, it is surprising that Jarrett Stidham has ribs.
One thing to look out for in this game is the fact that not every player on Louisville is Lamar Jackson. That should probably hurt them a little bit. If I was Bobby Petrino, I’d take my motorcycle down to some sort of science lab and work on cloning him to play every position. That would help them.
Florida vs. Tennessee
Tennessee has not won in the Swamp since 2003. Just take that in for a minute. What was even going on in 2003? Here’s a list of notable things that happened then: Return of the King was released. ITunes launched. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was released as a book.
That’s absurd. Tennessee seems to be on the wrong end of a lot of streaks, but hey, now they’re champions of life and they dunk a football into a trash can sometimes, so things are looking up. Expect this game to be just awful. Neither team is very exciting. Florida hasn’t put an offense on the field since 2009. Seriously, they just send a defense out there every game and don’t even play offense. It’s a revolutionary coaching style. It’s like those high school coaches who refuse to punt.
USC vs. Texas
This game is being advertised as a rematch 12 years in the making, but we’re going to set the record straight on that one. Both USC and Texas were very good back then, and that’s probably the best college football game I’ve ever seen. Now, only USC is good. Texas is not good. At all. So, it seems pretty cruel to act like this is some sort of rematch, considering Texas is a shell of the program it was back then.
Then again. Texas fans still press on, boats against the current, acting like they’re going to be back every year. It’s not their fault. It’s all of ours, too. We are the ones who put them in the top 25 even though they won five games last season. USC will most likely win this game by a lot. Texas would probably have a better chance if it was against Kansas….oh wait.