October was LGBT History Month, and now that this month has passed, I’ve been left to contemplate the significance of LGBT history and what it means to be gay in America today. LGBT History Month is a celebration of the history of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.

This is important for LGBT people because our heritage is a special case. Our culture isn’t passed down generationally through families, and our stories aren’t told in history class. Without a solid sense of history, gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered youth have only the superficial outlet of the mass media to help them cultivate their identity, and understand what it means to be an LGBT person in America.

When you realize that you aren’t heterosexual, you start to notice how society tells you that you are different and not part of the same culture that your peers are. Politicians, preachers and your peers tell you that gay people don’t fit in. This is not a healthy way for any person to develop their identity or their sense of place in society. You only begin to feel confused when you are bombarded with images that masquerade as representations of you that do not really reflect you, or make you feel destined for a life of despair.

The recent string of suicides should be a sobering indicator of what happens when we allow society to tell LGBT people that they have no worth, or that they have no place (or a low place). However, we now see a growing atmosphere of tolerance for LGBT people in our nation. This year, Judge Vaughn Walker struck down Proposition 8, giving gay and lesbian couples in the state of California the right to be married once more.

But tolerance and assimilation are not the solutions. Tolerance gives us rights. Acceptance gives human dignity. It will take acceptance and pluralism in society before LGBT people can feel included.

An accepting society would teach us the story of Bayard Rustin, the gay man who advised Dr. King on Ghandi and nonviolent resistance. We would hear the story of Jane Addams, a Nobel Prize-winning women’s suffrage leader and the first American woman to be a public philosopher. LGBT people would see, here in reality, how they truly do belong.

And perhaps most important of all, in a pluralistic, accepting society, LGBT people would not be victimized for being different. We would have a society where people aren’t denigrated because they dress or act in a way that is perceived to be “too gay.” In an accepting culture, Kirk Hummel of “Glee” would be accepted just as much as Oscar Martinez of “The Office” — as much as any straight character who doesn’t face discrimination on the basis of their heterosexuality.

In an article published in The CW in early October, columnist Michael Patrick suggested that the “gay culture has been aggressively pushing a counter-heteronormative agenda.”

While this remains to be seen (and I do not believe it is so), I agree that LGBT people should not feel disdain for heteronormativity (cultural norms associated with heterosexuality). Instead, it is heterosexism, the belief that heterosexuality is inherently superior, that should be aggressively combated. It is this sentiment that endangers the equality and even the lives of LGBT people.

Heterosexism permeates society at many levels. It keeps LGBT people out of the history books and deeply in the closet. Worst of all, it breeds a self-contempt that drives our youth to take their own lives. We cannot truly be equal if we abide in a society that tells people that they are lesser if they are not heterosexual.

How can you expect gay people to act “normal” when the very normality they are expected to adhere to precludes them because of their sexual orientation? How just is normality if it enables us to mistreat a person based on how they dress, the way they talk or the gender of the person they love? LGBT people can look and behave as “normal” as everyone else, but they will still be denied rights, face the threat of violence and encounter bigotry. History shows us that this is the case.

Like Harvey Milk said, “All men are created equal. No matter how hard you try, you can never erase those words.” And maybe the bullet that struck Harvey Milk didn’t destroy every closet door like he wanted, but I certainly hope the story of his triumph destroys a few. To my fellow LGBT people (and all people): Learn your history, find your voice, and never be afraid because you are different.

Alex Hollinghead is a junior majoring in math and philosophy.