For most students, college is their first taste of independent living. Moving away from home, forming new relationships in a novel environment and even unassuming tasks such as laundry and cleaning dishes are important stepping stones in the process of transforming highschoolers into career-ready adults. Student reluctance to leave the nest and parent overinvolvement have the potential to interfere with this important time.
According to an Indeed article, independence is one of the seventeen qualities that employers seek in employees. Many of the other qualities — such as responsibility and adaptability — can be developed through independent interaction with the world. At a time when a college degree seems the norm, possession of these abstract skills is more important than ever.
Throughout my freshman year, I heard stories of students who rely on their parents to clean their dorms or do their laundry. While it sounds ridiculous that some parents are willing to regularly drive to Tuscaloosa to handle what should be their child’s responsibilities, a quick look at one of the many parent groups on Facebook reveals the sometimes absurd level of parent involvement in what should be student affairs.
Of course I do not discourage support from parents or other family members. Financially or otherwise, it is unrealistic for most college students to earn a degree completely independently in modern times. I would consider my parents my greatest asset in college. When there is uncertainty or a tough decision to be made, I take comfort in knowing I have their support and guidance, but I can not help but feel that some parents are selling their children short through their unrelenting presence.
Likewise, I learned that some students use a professional laundry service. This is not just dry cleaning for formal clothes, but a service that picks up dirty clothes from the student and returns them after cleaning, completely stripping students of all responsibility.
Considering that residence halls are equipped with washers and driers available for a far cheaper fee than professional laundry services, subscribing to this service feels like a way to defer the inevitable onset of adulthood.
While many of these examples provided might seem small or unimportant, they have a far more detrimental effect on the psychology of the student, reinforcing helplessness and incompetence.
Independence does not have to be gained solely through these miniscule chores, but will inevitably be developed throughout a student’s college experience. Becoming involved in extracurriculars, making new friends and taking advantage of the numerous opportunities available on campus can facilitate independence.
Some of my best memories come from the first few weeks of college. Faced with independence and more free time than in my high school days, I spent afternoons throwing frisbees on the quad, watching movies with my roommates and exploring UA’s vast campus. It was through these experiences that I learned how to balance my free time while maintaining academic success.
Students should face their challenges head on and understand that growth is born out of struggle. Parents should give their children room to grow, providing support when necessary while not robbing them of valuable learning opportunities. Facing the joys, turmoil and responsibilities that come with college is the first step toward a lifetime of independence, so embrace it.
